Tuesday, January 29, 2008

I can't believe it

The journey seemed like it would never end and now it seems like the end has snuck up on me. I am just two weeks away from the B.O.O.M. retreat and I am starting to feel nervous for probably the first time.

So much time and energy have been spent, not by me, but by my family and friends and church. It seems as if I would be letting them all down if for some reason I did not make it though this year, we are not supposed to use the word fail.

I know in my heart and in my spirit that God has called me to ministry. Of that there is no doubt. I have never felt at home as I do when I am in the pulpit, okay walking around the pulpit! The sense that I feel when I am teaching or counseling or talking to a teen or visiting someone in the hospital is just so powerful. So the reality of the call is not the fear.

I just want to continue on with my ministry, go to the next chapter, wherever that might lead me.

Perhaps it is I am just tired as I sit here in the hallway of Willow Valley and type this. It has been a long couple of days and one more to go. I want to go home and be with my family and relax with them.

This evening as I went through my devotionals from the Message, I read Exodus 1-4. The question pertaining to the reading that I journaled on was what is it like when you say, "God will be with me".

My answer? It is the most comforting feeling in the world. god has placed me here at this time for a reason, I may not know what it is but what I do know is that God is there. In the end, what else could I ask for.

So in a few weeks, hit or miss on ordination, I know this one thing(well other than my family loves me):

The God of Abraham, Jacob, Isaac, and Joseph is with me and will never let me down.

Truly, what else do I need?

Peace!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Amen fear not Brother He has not given us a spirit of fear.
He is with you forever.